“Why can’t it always be this good?” Ever asked yourself this at the end of a summer vacation, or a great meal, or a particularly yummy sex romp? Well, it can be!
It can’t always be the same. Most of us can’t live our whole lives on a beach or in bed with that dream partner, but let’s face it, we’d probably get bored anyway. It’s not that particular activity that we’re wishing could continue ad infinitum, but that feeling.
So, here’s a simplistic four-step program to keep life rich, and my own family’s experience as an example:
What if your happiness does not depend on getting what you want?
This is a radical notion, so it bears repeating:
What… if… your happiness does not depend on getting what you want?
Speaking for both Carrie and myself, I can tell you, we are in constant pursuit of what we want. We are greatly defined by our ambitions. We want what we want - with a passion. So when I heard this question from Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön, one of my favorite spiritual teachers, it cracked something open in me. I was listening to her audio CD, True Happiness, while cruising to the studio one morning. And before I got out of the car, I had to just sit.
When Gretchen Rubin called from New York to book a Style Statement session, we didn’t know that we were becoming part of her year-long exploration into the theories, methods and musings on how to be happy. Her blog is the go to place on happiness tips.
Top 5 Things We Love About Gretchen Rubin’s Happiness Project
1. “There is only love.” Check out Gretchen’s Twelve Commandments. Lovely precision.
2. Fourteen tips to avoid nagging. (Every Wednesday is Tip Day!)
3. The How Mindful Are You? Take the quiz.
4. “What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.” (Colette.) One of the many great quotes that Gretchen has collected.
5. Our interview! Gretchen asked us some great questions about what floats our boats.
Gretchen Rubin had an a-ha moment while riding the bus one day with her daughter. Just like any ol’ day they were heading to elementary school when her daughter burst out with joy about the city scenery. And it struck Gretchen that THIS was life. There was no magical, evolved place to arrive at. Everyday was an opportunity to be happy.
So she gave herself a year to “test-drive every principle, tip, theory, and scientific study” on happiness. And the Happiness Project was born. Her blog is wildly popular (because it’s inspiring and useful. We especially like this Wednesday Tip on cutting down what you buy,) and her book comes out next year!
She interviewed us about our happiness metrics. It made us stop…and smile. You should try these questions on for yourself. This was one of our favourites:
Have you ever been surprised that something you expected would make you very happy, didn’t – or vice versa?
When Gretchen Rubin called from New York to book a 
