How do you define your self worth?

Daily | November 5th, 2008 by Carrie McCarthy

“Know yourself. Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” - Ann Landers

Carrie says: My self worth is slightly conflicted. I feel worthy when I am of service; doing Style Statement sessions, listening to a friend or picking up litter. And I must admit my a small part of my self worth is caught up in proving myself; published a book, own a lovely home, know “successful” people. This part of me is diminishing and I am honoring the joy of creating a life of beauty and meaning.

Danielle says: Creativity + Integrity = Inner Abundance.

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Dimitar Nikolov 11/05/2008 03:55 AM 1 point
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I've never tried to define my self worth. If you ask me, life is all about enjoying yourself, having fun and relaxing. Work, money, family, friends are just a way of achieving that. But if I start to think about it, I could say my value is to make others and myself happy.

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Pema 11/05/2008 03:58 AM 1 point
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My worth is strongest as part of a teeming community of do-gooders, peace-bringers, and sea-changers: O b a m a !

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DanielleLaPorte 11/05/2008 01:35 PM 1 point
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Yes! Congratulations! O B A M A. His speech last night was one of the most powerful oratories I've ever heard. The man know his self worth and is calling everyone to take responsibility for theirs!

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lifecoachsandy 11/05/2008 06:40 AM 1 point
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My self worth is defined by giving and receiving a balance of inspiration, learning and vulnerability.
Being in service to others is one of my top values, and being respectful of myself and others is equally important. Boundaries!

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Chantal 11/05/2008 07:32 AM 1 point
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Not sure I think in terms of self worth. I have to think about that a little more.
I do feel my best when I am of service, giving back, being creative and tapping into my inner wisdom. Living from the inside out!

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Jamie 11/05/2008 07:51 AM 1 point
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I heard a story of a speaker who had a $100 bill. He showed it to the audience and asked how much it was worth. Of course, everyone said $100. Then he stomped on it, twisted it, folded it, squished it, crumpled it; you get the idea. And he asked, "Now, how much is it worth?"

I believe deeply in the inherent worth of each of us, myself included. Nothing is required.

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Kristen 11/05/2008 08:00 AM 1 point
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It's a feeling.....the way I feel when I'm giving it everything I've got.

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Wazzy 11/05/2008 08:51 AM 1 point
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I guess I don't think about my self-worth very much. I feel a lot of love from my friends and family and sometimes I think that is the evidence of it in my face. This is a challenging time for me, in that I am learning to work from the inside out. And so...I am almost trying to prove my worthiness to myself, by taking care of myself.

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JoeM 11/05/2008 08:53 AM 1 point
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It's defined by the limits of my constructive and positive participation in life - spiritually, physically, and emotionally. By the number of good works, the depth of their impact, and how many these works have directly affected, to some benefit. My self worth can only be judged at the end of my efforts, and they must be undeniably framed throughout with integrity, honor, and the selfless concern for others. Unfortunately, I seem to always find myself lacking, so it is a 24/7 job.

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Colette 11/05/2008 08:58 AM 1 point
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In the past I equated my value with what I am able to do, so really I was not valuing me, but rather my abilities and what I accomplished. Over the last 11 years I've had the opportunity to revise this thinking. My value, my self worth, now comes from the perspective "I am valuable because I am me." This gives far more meaning to anything I say, think, or do.

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duck 11/05/2008 09:09 AM 1 point
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When I'm challenging myself creatively and succeeding. Surrounding myself with good people and being there for them.

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Tina 11/05/2008 09:41 AM 1 point
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When I'm with my kids - and I mean really WITH them, I feel that I'm giving the best of myself and I can see in their smiles that they appreciate these moments and what I have to give. I have never felt such self worth as I do when I feel I"m giving them my all and that day to day I'm doing my very best for these little creatures!

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laurie_matthews 11/05/2008 10:09 AM 1 point
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I greatly identify with what Carrie said. My self-worth is often tied to the deeds I do and the service I am to friends and family and coworkers.

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weezie 11/05/2008 10:13 AM 1 point
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My self worth is defined by my ability to make others feel good about themselves, my intellect, and my sophisticated esthetic (Sophisticated Harmony here).

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weezie 11/05/2008 10:14 AM 1 point
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And I would never underestimate my dogs' admiration!

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rock girl 11/05/2008 10:16 AM 1 point
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Good deeds/thoughts minus bad deeds/thoughts = self worth. I think I am only literally worth my net effect on the world, and every day is an effort to justify my existence by being a good person. This is not a bad thing.

I also think self worth is different from self esteem, which I would define as something you earn for yourself when you put effort into things (work, goals, your appearance - superficial things) and which slips away when you are lazy.

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kerrymac 11/05/2008 11:15 AM 1 point
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Much like Carrie about needing to prove myself in the past by accomplishing things for other to witness. Now I try to step away, do unexpected, anonymous gestures more and volunteer less for things my heart is not in...like serving sushi to kids at school!
My self worth becomes obvious when I see how my boys need me...taking care of me so I can be there for them has become more important in my life as a Momma.
www.snickerdoodles.typepad.com

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MoJo 11/05/2008 11:15 AM 1 point
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Mistakenly I have defined it by my achievements and what I 'do'. In the past few years (thanks to motherhood and changing jobs) I have begun to shift it subtly to who I am, and how that is reflected and brought forth into the world around me. It's very closely linked to self-expression...

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Suzyn 11/05/2008 10:53 PM 1 point
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I starting to notice the same shift, though I often get stuck in the "oops, I'm sitting down, gotta be doing something" cycle.

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Lindsay 11/05/2008 11:37 AM 1 point
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i think it does come down to boundaries for me.... something i've always struggled with. I'm learning now to use my voice, be more honest and honor my heart instead of just being "the nice girl" all the time. Taking my power back gives me confidence and allows me to recognize my self worth more clearly... it's a huge step.

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Natasha L 11/05/2008 12:36 PM 1 point
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By asking, how much do I have to offer and am I offering it? I wrote more but really it all comes back to that...am I living up to my potential? Only I can answer that.

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Steve Harvey 11/05/2008 01:18 PM 1 point
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Lets do some math:

(my actions based on love, values and principals) + (achieved goals and growth)
minus,
(my actions based on fear, ego and inconsideration) + (procrastination)
equals,

Mr. Creative Faith

Validation from others has nothing to do with it. I mean it's great to KNOW I have great friends, family and a bank account reflecting professional success. Sure, these things make me smile, and happiness is everything. But I still need to DEAL every night I lay my head down, That is the time that counts most...for me. So if I am sleeping well (without Vodka!), smiling and laughing with friends, and NOT seeking approval...my WORTH is high.

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Daily

How do you define your self worth?

“Know yourself. Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” - Ann Landers

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