It is 5 p.m. After a long day of work we know it is time to go home. The temptation of one more mail, and just finishing up that one final project is strong, and too often the “few extra minutes” lead to 15, then 30, then 60 and before we know it we’re late for dinner. We walk in the door, eat quickly and launch into the bedtime routine with the kids. Another day has passed.

A habit is, by definition, an “acquired mode of behavior that has become nearly or completely involuntary.” As a habit, it does not require reflection or conscious decision making, but rather emerges as an ingrained behavior.

The term “a nasty habit” referring to everything from smoking to watching late night television, suggests that a habit may not always be one that is healthy for our body or spirit.

A New Direction

The wooden horn sounds for the first time at OUR Ecovillage, where our family is living for a month. The horn is handmade of wood, with soft curves and a weight that makes it oh so satisfying to lift up and blow. Each member of the community has a unique style of blowing the horn – from the short toot to an echoing two-toned blow that must travel for miles. It is blown once to awaken us (from our beds and our work), and twice to summon us to the table, where Jan, our wondrous cook has prepared yet another extraordinary meal from the ingredients found in our garden. This time, it is telling us that dinner is almost ready.

I raise my head at the sound of the horn and realize how quickly the afternoon has passed – it is time to close down just as I was really getting started…. I take a deep breath, save my work and the computer closes shut.

Living by the horn has brought a new awareness of the importance of transition times. I find myself delighting in the opportunity to gently move from one activity into the next. The temptation of pushing it just five, 15, 30 more minutes is simply not there. The horn has sounded, the community is gathering, and it is time for us to join together and be nourished.

This is a new way of being for our family – with two workaholic parents we’ve had a hard time defining those boundaries between work and family time. The horn is a reminder to all of us who live here, a summons to come back from our personal work to the life of the community. I know that I have the next fifteen minutes in which to ease back into the rhythm of my family and friends.

Reality Check

This idyllic life of wooden horns and gourmet, locally grown meals cooked by someone other than me will end in just a few weeks. We will have moved in to our own home then, and my office will be there as well. Life together, while filled with moments of connection and laughter, is accompanied by the hectic juggling of work, kids, school, activities and friends. Too often the routine seems to not allow space for us to slow down.

A Better Way: Tips For Slowing Down

Sadly, we don’t have a wooden horn, but we do have a choice of how we want to live as a family.

Is there another way? It seems to me that perhaps the secret to slowing down is to be found in the beauty of transitions. There are so many spaces through the day that could allow for gentler transition times. Here are a few ideas:

1. Stop Rushing. No pushing the kids out the door, no leaving without a proper breakfast… if you’re late, you’re late.
2. Wake up 15 minutes earlier to allow for some morning snuggle time with your sweetie and your children before the craziness of the morning routine.
3. Try eating in silence for the first 10 minutes of a meal to bring a spirit of true gratitude for the meal before you and the opportunity to sit together.
4. Agree on an ending time for your work day. Use the final 15 minutes to shut down your computer and prepare your desk for the next day’s work. On the way home, read a good book instead of thinking about work.
5. After a long day go out together for a five-minute play or walk outside before sitting down to dinner.

We all know how good it feels when we honor the natural rhythm of our bodies, minds and hearts and take the time to enjoy and be present in the moment. Our modern life doesn’t always make it easy, but the space is always there if we allow.

Question: What is your favorite transition time with your family? Share your ideas in the comments, below…

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Photo by ChristofferEngström.