Usually, I like to write a lovey intro to our Inspired Interviews to set the stage for our guest and really convey our admiration for them. But Mary Jaksch is such a rare bird, I’m going to let her swoop in with her bio in her own words. In my words: wow!

“I have achieved quite a few milestones in my journey through life: I’m a Zen master, psychotherapist and author. My book Learn to Love is now translated into five languages and I have recently published an Ebook called Overcome Anything: Finding the Light after Darkness. I’ve been awarded an MA in Religious Studies, hold a 4th Dan Black belt in karate, started my professional life as a flautist, and love dancing Argentine tango in skimpy skirts. That’s quite a strange mix, isn’t it?”

(Mary, I’d love to know what your Style Statement is!) Read to the end this interview to get a free copy of Mary’s e-book, Overcoming Anything.

Just by virtue of being you, what are you teaching?

I don’t really know what I teach by virtue of being me. Maybe that’s a good thing!

You be the judge. What would you learn from this? Yesterday David and I went to a special tango class here in Buenos Aires—where we’re staying for a couple of months. The seminar was called ‘Creative Concepts’. One of the exercises was to dance as ‘Fire’. We had to stay close to each other but not touch and react with intensity to each other’s movement. David and I slowly sank to the floor and rolled about the floor together in quite an erotic manner. We were completely in our own little world. When the music stopped, we looked up to see the teachers and the much younger other participants looking down at us open-mouthed…no one else had considered descending to the floor, let along writhing on it! We got a lot of praise from the teachers, because our example really livened up the class. (Photo of Mary and her tango partner, David above.)

My young friends who are just heading into adolescence keep on telling me to grow up… They also tell me that I’m a role model for them because I’m spontaneous, love playing, really listen to them, love them to bits, and make them feel special.

What books, movies, or CDs have been most helpful or inspiring to you?

Ah, books…I don’t have problems with drugs, alcohol, or overeating. But books are a problem. Sometimes I think I should initiate an “Amazon Anonymous” group… I just love books so much! There’s always a stack of my current favorites beside my bed. Each book I read subtly changes the way I perceive the world.

However, what influenced me most in the last three years was not a book, but a series of lectures on Positive Psychology by Tal Ben-Shahar. His talks are totally inspiring! Positive Psychology focuses on building strengths, and not on repairing damage. It’s not new-age and woolly. Instead, Positive Psychology rests on rigorous research and gives a whole new basis to concepts such as the power of positive thinking, goal setting, the benefits of meditation and exercise, and so on.
Since then I’ve been reading a lot of related books, such Martin Seligman’s book Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realize Your Potential for Lasting Fulfillment. That particular book really opened new doors of understanding for me and inspired me to write an article called Authentic Happiness. It sparked a very interesting discussion!

As to music: my taste is a bit weird. I used to be a professional flautist, so I love classical music. However, I’ve recently developed a taste for electronic tango. It sounds a bit like Trance mixed with traditional tango. I dance a lot with my partner David who is a tango teacher. Some people have a fit when they see a Zen master dressed in a skimpy tango dress! See a clip of us doing a steamy performance!

What inspires you?

People inspire me! I’ll give you an example: a few days ago I was at the hairdressers. I started talking to the young stylist. It turned out that she had been a professional jockey. Then she had a terrible fall, broke her back and pelvis and the doctors told her that she would never walk again, let alone ride. But she disagreed with them, saying, “I know my body better than you do and I will get it to heal!” Then she devised a daily exercise routine and clawed her way back to health. Now she’s even riding again. A personal story like that inspires me!

I love helping people to discover their passion in life. Often people come to me because they can’t figure out what it is they want to do with their life. When they finally find out, they start to develop and shine. And then they feel so much happier and more content!

My readers at GoodlifeZen.com inspire me! When I first started my blog, I only had a foggy idea of what a blog is. I was amazed to discover that blogging is not just about writing articles—it’s a process of co-creation. The wonderful comments people offer, widen and deepen the original theme of each article. One of the most interesting conversations with my readers came about in response to my article Is there Life After Death?

In their comments, readers shared some extraordinary personal experiences!

How do you know when you’re inspired?

I know when I’m inspired because I get excited! Inspiration and passion seem to be fused. For example, when an idea hits me, my pulse starts to race. Then I rush to my laptop or get my notebook out of my bag, and start writing.

When people inspire me, I’m often moved to tears. Sometimes, when I’m talking with someone, I suddenly get a vision of their full potential. I can see a talent or strength that’s still hidden from them. This is a moving experience both for the other person, as well as for me. We all are capable of so much more than we imagine!

What’s the feeling you’re usually trying to achieve?

My aim is to feel alert and at ease. Actually, I think those two feelings together equate to happiness. When I’m feeling alert, I’m really present. I can listen deeply to others, and I’m in touch with my own feelings. When I’m at ease, I enjoy the moment, without thinking about what I should be doing, or what other people might think. I think that joy is often spoiled by being self-conscious.

Ease is a wonderful thing. When I’m at ease, my body relaxes and I get into the ‘zone’. Suddenly everything seems easier and more joyful.

To be at ease also means being able to adjust easily to different life circumstances. So often we are guided by our idea of what an experience should be like, instead of feeling our way into what each moment brings. Ease means relaxing into each moment, without struggling against it.

What advice are you always giving to people?

1. Trust yourself! So often we look to others for approval or for guidance. But actually, each of us has a deep inner wisdom that can help us steer our course through life. The problem is that many people don’t have the confidence to trust in their own wisdom. When you start to believe in yourself, and to trust your own wisdom, life starts to flourish.

2. Be kind to yourself and others! If we all practice kindness, the world will become a better place. Kindness makes us feel happier, as well as those around us—as I explain in my article Want to Make Friends and Feel Happier? Try Kindness!

What would you like to revolutionize?

I’m passionate about finding ways to help people transform their life in order to fulfill their potential and to find happiness. There are traditional ways, such as spiritual training and therapy. However, I think there is something missing in how we try to help people. To be of real service to others, spiritual teachers need to stop preaching, and therapists need to stop therapizing. If we are to be potent guides, we need to be like a big sister or big brother, not an expert telling people what to do.

My blog is my first attempt at finding a different way. It’s working and I’m happy to see more and more readers join the GoodlifeZen community. But my blog is only the first step. I want to develop more ways to inspire people so that they can really transform their life.

In fact, I’m working on an exciting new project at the moment. It’s come about through joining super-blogger Leo Babauta on his writers’ blog WritetoDone as Chief Editor. Leo and I, together with Shilpan Patel (who is a rising star in the blogging world) are jointly working on a new project. All three of us are passionate about helping others fulfill their potential and achieve their dreams. We are currently working on a project that will help writers—and especially bloggers—to develop confidence, build and hone skills they don’t even know they have, and hit success big time. (We’ll reveal more on Writetodone.com as time goes by—stay tuned!)

I think that this project will show us how to become catalysts for lasting transformation. I hope we can then use the experience we’ve gathered in order to set up a life-changing program for motivated people so that they can develop their potential, achieve their dreams, and find happiness. That’s my mission in life!

What are the tools of your trade?

My tools are words. I love writing and enjoy leading workshops and retreats. I’ve recently written an eBook called Overcome Anything: Finding the Light after Darkness. I wrote it after I lost a lot of money when a rogue builder vanished to a South Sea island with the funds for building my new house. He left behind a half-built structure which steadily degraded in the rain. You can imagine how worrying and depressing that was! We had to sell it at a substantial loss. That was a difficult time. So, I thought it would be good to use my own experience of getting my life back on track after a shock.

At first I was going to sell the eBook. But then, seeing how the world seems to be descending into a global crisis and many people are bound to suffer through difficult times, it seemed more appropriate to give away the book for free so that many people can benefit from the inspiring stories and helpful tips in Overcome Anything. Annie B., a reader said, “Wow, I found myself profoundly moved by the passages in this book. I believe this book should be required reading for anyone who is breathing. Reading it made me feel stronger and more alive!”

You can get a free copy on GoodlifeZen.com.